Prep the olives. Drain the olives well and pat them dry. Too much brine will make the dressing overly salty and thin.
Mince the aromatics. Grate or finely mince the garlic.
Chop the parsley and any additional herbs you’re using.
Start the base. In a food processor or blender, add the olives, garlic, lemon juice, red wine vinegar, Dijon, and honey. Pulse a few times to break everything down.
Stream in the oil. With the machine running on low, slowly stream in the olive oil until the mixture looks thick and slightly creamy. You’re aiming for a spoonable dressing, not a smooth puree.
Adjust the texture. Add cold water, 1 tablespoon at a time, pulsing after each addition until you reach your preferred consistency.
Add herbs and season. Stir in the chopped parsley and herbs by hand to keep some texture.
Add black pepper and taste before adding any salt. If using capers, lemon zest, or red pepper flakes, fold them in now.
Balance the flavor. If it tastes too sharp, add a touch more olive oil or another 1/2 teaspoon honey. If it’s too thick, loosen with another splash of water or lemon juice.
Serve or chill. Use immediately or let it sit for 10–15 minutes to let the flavors meld.
The dressing will thicken slightly as it rests.